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Grenade? Hammer? What’s the difference!?

todayJuly 3, 2024 12

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Do you know someone who did something extremely dumb, like something that should’ve (let’s be honest) at the VERY least maimed them… badly… 

People like this, go find a nice warm corner, bubble wrap yourself, because: 

YOU HAVE USED UP ALL YOUR LUCK JUICE!!!

But first, what is “Miracle Juice?”

  • Imagine when you’re born, you have a imaginary cup, and in it, is all the luck you’ll have in life. Every time you do something dumb, and nothing happens, a little luck juice runs out of the cup. Every time you win a prize or something similar, a little luck juice runs out of the cup. You get the idea! 

Qin, a woman in China, pushed the boundaries of my “luck juice” theory.

She lives in a rural area. So amenities, tools, what have you are not always available. So, you make do with what you have.  

Qin needed a hammer. One day, she’s there out and about in the rural farmlands, and finds a wooden handle with a metal tip. Not the traditional look of a hammer but can be used as one! 

So for 2 decades, Qin uses her makeshift hammer nailing in nails and crushing nuts and and and… 

20 years of hammering go by, and some people come by to do construction or whatever it may be on her house, when someone on the team noticed her hammer… 

Like a bunch of politicians when actual work comes across their desks, these builders SCATTERED!!! 

Qin’s hammer she found randomly lying around in the veld, turned out to be a Chinese Type 67… 

What is a Chinese Type 67? Don’t worry, I googled it for you!

IT’S A TYPE OF CHINESE HAND GRENADE!!!

(CLEARLY not a hammer!!!)

Ouma Qin, for 20 years, was moering in nails and cracking nuts with a device that was designed to kill! 

The theory is that it was a training grenade but nope… the right people came out and disposed of it properly and it exploded the way they were designed to… 

Their theory as to why it did not explode while Qin used it to pummel cashews: “Apparently, even hand grenades have principles and won’t explode on kind-hearted elderly people!” 

Ouma Qin, you have officially used up ALL your luck juice!!! In fact your family, your neighbours, even the dog down the street have ALL had their luck juice drained thanks to you!!!

Written by: Jacques

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